Butter chicken is the dish that has nourished me at every stage of life

I remember my first taste of butter chicken. I must have been about 10 years old. My dad’s cousins used to marinate a whole chicken from their farm in yoghurt, spices, ginger, garlic and chilli, before cooking it over an open fire.

Everything they used was from their own land: delicious tomatoes, homemade yoghurt, white makhan (a cultured butter). It was such an experience – and such a beautiful dish – that throughout the long train journey home after visiting them, I hassled my mum to make it for us at home. But those delicate spices, and the smoky flavour from cooking over an open fire, are impossible for me to replicate, even now.

My understanding of regional food came partly from holidays, partly from the fact that my dad worked at the steel plant alongside others from all over India. At school, my friends and I would peer into each other’s tiffin boxes, keen to see what exciting regional dishes we’d be able to share with each other.

Each mouthful of butter chicken taught me how one dish can vary so much. The spices are generally the same, but the techniques used to make it vary so much.

Butter chicken is a comforting, warming dish that feels decadent thanks to its silky-smooth richness. The most important thing is that you marinate the chicken fully to allow the flavour of the spices to shine. For a truly authentic experience, enjoy it with crispy naan and a side of pickled sliced onions.

When I was a young girl, butter chicken was for special occasions only. Money was tight and dining out was a luxury saved for family holidays. My mum used to make her own version at home, but instead of cream, she used a combination of milk and yoghurt. It was only when I travelled with my family to the Punjab during school holidays that I was able to enjoy the different, beautiful texture and flavours of the butter chicken.

Since then, it’s a dish I’ve been fascinated by. If done well, it can be an incredibly smoky, succulent and satisfying creation.

My elder daughter, Reet, was just six months old when she had her first taste of butter chicken. Dining at a wedding in India, she sat on my lap and snatched a piece of chicken from my dish. Immediately, she screamed for more.

Since then, I began to make it for her – and later, for her younger sister Neev – at home. As it’s such a favourite, I’ve taught them both how to make this dish themselves.

Serving butter chicken in my restaurant allowed me to take people back to my roots – to taste the food I grew up eating. It’s a recipe that fills me with nostalgia, and with hope, love, power and knowledge at each step of my career.